Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Why I don't need to drink and drive:

These are the things I pondered on the way home from work today.

Is it Bar-B-Q or Bar-Be-Que or BBQ? They are spelled differently on every other sign I come across and frankly it’s freaking me out. Also the pronunciation of words like coupon – is it coopon or quepon? Route – is rowt or root? Caribbean – is carribeeyen or carry be-en? This is what keeps me up at night, people.

I over use paper products like paper towels and toilet paper. It’s a bad habit and I blame part of it on my OCD. What if I am single handedly responsible for global warming and I don’t know it? I mean I recycle at home but what if that doesn’t make up for all the other stuff?

Why do I have such gut wrenching, overprotective, motherly love for my dog? Is it because I never had children of my own and is it even normal?

When I was growing up I was obsessed with Mary Tyler Moore and I wanted to be just like her character. A single woman in a studio apartment with a fabulous job and dating good looking guys, who wouldn’t want to be her? I always wanted to see what her closet looked like because she used to change her clothes in it so it must have been huge. Is it weird that I always wondered where her character would be today? I know they made a movie, believe me I watched it.

Is it weird that I am more interested in the actors in popular commercials than what they are selling? Like the Progressive girl or the credit report .com guy? I’m interested in their lives and who they really are so much that I google them. A little on the stalker side…yay or nay?

This is reason #691 I don’t have children. I have absolutely no useless information or knowledge to pass on to them. I also worry they would have inherited my unhealthy appetite for ridiculous and unimportant facts.

It’s only a 20 minute commute and I was singing along to the radio. How do they even let me have a license?


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