Wednesday, January 27, 2010

The hills are alive...

It's true, my neighborhood is falling apart. The homes on the hill overlooking our neighborhood are not safe, and our property value is sinking as quickly as the hill. Looks like poorly crafted "retaining wall" and lack of permit could be the cause. We are hearing that the part of the hill in question was created to be able to sell more homes at a higher cost, speculation at this point. If this is true, it was not created well. It was not packed correctly and the wall is not sturdy. It is really sad for those 25 families still in hotels. My family is at least back home, but now we live with the uncertainty of the safety of our home, neighborhood and diminishing property value. It is very upsetting.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Walking on sunshine...until the earth caved in and swallowed a house.

The weather this weekend was fabulous! Sunny and in the low 70's, sheer perfection. We opened all the windows and let the sun shine in. We also managed to have a picnic at the park Saturday afternoon and Max had a blast running and chasing his ball. We laid out on a blanket while Big Red read and I people and dog watched. I didn't want it to end but once the breeze got chilly we were out of there.

It was such a beautiful weekend until I got a text from H on Sunday saying he was now homeless! He and Monkey Boy will be at a hotel for a few days due to some natural disaster in their neighborhood...oh the drama. I finally saw it on the news this morning and what a mess. Here is hoping the whole family is back at home soon!


Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Nothing but a b thing (as in birthday)

I heart Pepcid AC because I have had ridiculous heartburn for days and was chewing TUMS like candy, with no noticeable difference at all. It was so pressing that I dropped everything on my desk and took a trip to Walgreen's to talk to the pharmacist. Pepcid AC is now my quick acting friend who will stay in my desk for situations just like this one. I'm sure it has absolutely nothing to do with my oh so healthy diet (said sarcastically). Heartburn sucks, do you think it's because of my drinking binge from the past weekend? Ha, I call it binge after two margaritas and 2 big ass beers! What does that tell you...I used to be able to suck down shots like a sailor and still walk upright, what the hell? Oh, how the mighty fall, no more liquid lunch birthday celebrations for me! Speaking of birthdays...

Here is Michelle with a big piece of chocolate cake in her hand blowing out her other dessert. Notice her "flirtini" (martini w/champagne) is full, she had many more that night. Fast Eddie made the chocolate cake and it was delish!

I also forgot to tell you that Friday night Michelle fell in the ladies restroom and also left the door unlocked so two women walked in on her. When she told me about it I thought to myself that I need to make sure I go with her the next time she uses the restroom and promptly forgot. When I brought it up Tuesday morning, she didn't even remember. Oh to be 28 and have that just be a little hiccup in your day. I would have bruises and probably would have ended up on crutches with my old bones all fragile like. It sounds like I'm 80, right? If you're only as old as you feel then 80 would be about right. Remember that episode of The Office where Michael was on crutches and fell in the bathroom and got stuck between the toilet and wall? No one wanted to come in and help him. That still makes me laugh. Something tells me I missed a golden comedic moment by not going to the ladies room with Michelle, damn!


Sunday, January 17, 2010

I only have a minute...

but I wanted to let you know that Michelle was trying to tell me a story and she got these two people confused.

Barry Gordy

Phil Spector

Is it just me or do they not look anything alike even when you are squinting?

I found it incredibly funny but I was on my second margarita so at that point everything was pretty damn funny to me. We had a liquid lunch on Friday for Michelle's birthday (which continued in to a liquid evening) and I am so old that I spent most of Saturday in bed with a headache. God, how I miss the days I could have a few drinks, stay out all night and still get up the next morning feeling fine. Growing up sucks, I'm going back to bed.


Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Max is whack

So I'm a little tired this morning, every morning. Max has been waking me up at night with his needy ways. Almost every night he jumps on the bed in the middle of the night and finds a warm spot at the foot of our bed. We don't mind, it's a big bed and we are only too happy to share. However...Max has been acting up lately during the day by destroying a grocery bag or snagging cough drops off my nightstand and leaving the red cherry colored stains on my side of the bed. Do you think he is mad about something?

Last night he jumped up at 2 a.m. and apparently performed a number from the smash Broadway hit Stomp. Maybe he was doing his impression of an entire marching band marching their way across our bed or he thought it was Mardi Gras and decided to be a float in a parade. I really don't know the reason for his impromptu performance but whatever the reason I finally had to tell him to knock it off and get down. What the hell? We let him out at night if he has to go and he tells us by click click clicking his way down the hall to the kitchen but this week he has been very scrooge like.

I think he may be in love with the doberman next door. They lick each other through the fence and they have formed a connecting hole under the fence where Max leaves his toys for the doberman to play with. It is perfectly fine with me that the doberman is a boy, I am nothing if not tolerant and understanding of all lifestyles. Max whines at the fence whenever he is outside and I do not know how to help him get over it. Please don't suggest I set up a play date for him because he is usually much more aggressive when face to face with other dogs who try to check out his goods, he has got to be a top. So it is back to being more strict with him and no more snacks because his begging is out of control. I hate being mean mom.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Please hold...

Sorry, I had to finish my .99 tacos from Jack in the Box. I feel heartburn coming on. So my weekend was fabulous and yesterday was my first day back at school. Microeconomics instead of Macroeconomics...don't ask me the difference 'cause I won't tell you, take the class. I was supposed to have a computer literacy class after that but it was cancelled so I was home by 8 p.m.

I'm quite sure you have heard of Pioneer Woman because she has the most fabulous recipes on her website. Well I decided this would be the weekend to try a recipe because they all sound soooo delicious. Here I am with all the ingredients along with my trusty laptop so I read how to make her food.
We had ribeye steaks, onion strings and crash hot potatoes and yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus because he brought me all the ingredients to make one of the best dinners ever. The onion strings were crunchy, flavorful and best of all the breading did not come off the onion. The crash hot potatoes were so tasty and easy to make but I did add my one little touch and that was bleu cheese. A little fresh rosemary, olive oil, sea salt with bleu cheese crumbles and 20 minutes in the oven made these delicious little potato crispy clouds my own personal heaven. Here is the after picture.

I fully realize I ruined the visual by putting this masterpiece on a paper plate, but oh the dishes I dirtied in the process with all the soaking, prepping, breading, etc....I couldn't deal with one more dirty dish. Cooking from scratch is hard! I love me some Pioneer Woman! Go check her out, she has the best recipes with pictures of every step so it's kind of hard to fuck it up. So take her for a spin and go forth and prosper...or get fat because this is not diet food, folks. I think I gained 10 pounds this weekend.


Friday, January 8, 2010

Wouldn't it be funny if people actually could freeze their ass off and all you see is frozen ass in the street?

You have got to be freaking kidding me. 22 degrees? I live in Texas not Antarctica. This is ridiculous so who do I have to talk to to get the heat turned back on in this state? I had to fill my car with gas this morning and I swear to you after just 3 minutes standing out in the cold wind my face was numb...couldn't feel my lips, I had to just assume they were still there and hadn't fallen off or anything. I don't know how people who live in Fargo or Michigan do it for such a long period of time. Are you just made tougher up there? This Hawaii girl is most delicate in frigid weather.

You know what I notice about it being so cold? There is more crap for me to carry. Winter coat...check, scarf...check, gloves...check, sweater for wearing in my office...check, chapstick...check. Where does it end and why is it so much harder getting up in the morning when it is so cold? I slept 7 hours straight last night, didn't even get up to pee. I can only assume people who live in Wisconsin or Minneapolis sleep better than the rest of us. It was fun for a while and I'm done now so...


Thursday, January 7, 2010

Calgon take me away

I think some days are just destined to kick my ass. There is one thing I hate about working in finance it is the closing period. It is a beating when you're under the gun and things have to happen NOW. It's only 9:30 a.m. and I feel so exhausted and my head hurts. I have to take a minute and center myself because the song "Pressure" by Billy Joel is looping through my mind. You ever wish you could just freeze time and transport yourself to your happy place, just for a little while? Silence is golden, my friend. Maybe I'm just having a bad dream and my maid and butler will come in to wake me up in time for my luxurious bath and bon bons. Oh to dream.


Wednesday, January 6, 2010

1,2,3 say look at me...dammit cut it out you guys!

I love this old family photo because look at me being all Ms. Pouty McPout in the back row. I have no idea why I was so mad in this photo. My mom right below me is smiling big and my dad, in the gold shirt on the end, looks happy so why not me? I also love it because no one is really paying attention so I guess this is a typical family photo. We didn't get professional photo's done back then, who would pay money when we could do it ourselves? Now I see why photographers charge so much.


Monday, January 4, 2010

Still crazy after all these years.

Do we look psycho? 'Cause we are. Das right.

Who do you think spent the New Year sick? Sigh...every year my sickness falls on a holiday. Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, it doesn't matter - the sickness never takes a holiday. I hate the sickness. I am finally feeling a little better today which is a good thing since I am at work. So much to do but my mind is still in vacation mode.

I spent my last day of vacation watching a marathon of "I shouldn't be alive" and "Human Prey"....HUGE MISTAKE! Have you ever watched this? I think it's on the Animal Planet channel. Anyway, I was up until after midnight because I could not stop thinking about being attacked by a bear, or a lion, or a shark, or an alligator, or a hyena...that's right, I saw a story where a man was attacked by a hyena. Did you know they have the most powerful bite of any animal? Ripped his ear clean off while he was sleeping then tried to drag him off. Note to self: CANCEL AFRICAN SAFARI.

Needless to say, my sleep last night was troubled at best. Big Red said I had a nightmare and was crying out, thankfully I don't remember but I hope I kicked it's ass. Now I know what to do if I am ever attacked though and I will be ready. FYI, go for the sharks eyes and they will loosen their jaws. They will probably still come back and eat you but I'd rather go with a sharks eyeball stuck on my thumb, wouldn't you?! I think I fear the shark the most because I am from Hawaii and I love swimming in the ocean so out of all those animals I would most likely be shark bait. Why do I watch things like this? Why do I subject myself to such images? Sick. I would make a resolution to never watch shows like this in 2010 but I don't make New Years resolutions. I have 364 other days to do that.

I did manage to stay up until 1 a.m. and ring in the New Year with my hubby, but for the most part all I did was medicate and sleep. Honestly, not such a bad vacation when you're medicated and warm in bed. Probably not as much fun for Big Red but he had his XBOX 360 new games to keep him busy. Hope the New Year brought nothing but goodness for everyone out there! Now I need to go have a talk with my brain and let it know vacation is over, it won't be pretty.