I thought it was gonna be plate lunches...

We went to a new eating establishment last night for dinner so I thought I would pretty much sum up my dining experience. We went because it was Hawaiian food and we have been waiting for months for this place to open. I mean we literally drove by every week to check it out. It's called Ohana's Hawaiian Grill and it's off of 1604 and Hausman. Now if you're in a rush, this is not the place to go because even though the wait staff was very friendly this is like a 5 course place. I started with the key lime martini which smelled like key lime but was strong as shit, I mean I could have breathed fire after a sip. Nothing wrong with a strong drink but I wanted to taste something else besides the vodka.

Next was the appetizer or if you were truly from Hawaii it is pupu, teriyaki chicken wings which were big and crispy but not very teriyaki tasting. Good flavor just not teriyaki tasting. This place was more Japanese than Hawaiian with our Benihana like set up and the cook doing the fancy moves. We moved on to the soup which was really just beef broth, and salad which was just okay. They could skip those two things and move the meal along, I was starving already! Then he started with the shrimp and it was somewhat tasty but I gave H most of them. We moved on to the veggies which were actually pretty good and then fried rice for R that we all got to taste, delicious. I do have to say that the chicken and steak were so tender and tasty and the sauces he had for them were ono! While I enjoyed the main course, I'm not so sure it was $90 good and we didn't even have sushi like the others!

I didn't care for the set up because it wasn't really conducive to conversation with the 7 people we had but I had Big Red on one side of me and H on the other so I had myself a fun time. While my hubby's Kalua Pig was good (he loved it) and R's Loco Moco (see picture above) looked delicious (he loved it too), I consider myself somewhat of an expert on local food and this wasn't really what I was expecting. It was upscale and all but a little pricey. Since my brother has a Hawaiian restaurant I have something to compare it to and I think my brothers is much more tasty and reasonable; but I am somewhat bias. Would I go back again? Yes, but I would try the lunch menu and the dessert because their choices sounded good. It is worth trying if you miss plate lunches and like to be entertained during dinner.

All in all it was a fun night because of the company and Saturday night was alright for fighting!

K

The pie heard 'round the world

I walk in to my parent's home carrying homemade mashed potatoes for Thanksgiving and immediately my mother says "Did you bring pie?". Now this conversation of who should bring what took place last weekend and when I said I would bring pie, I was shot down because my dad said he was making a pie. My response? "You said not to because dad was making a pie?". She retorts with "He did, but that's not enough for everyone, you said you were bringing a pie." UGH...it was not a good start. Firstly, who the hell is everyone? I thought it was just four of us, no one told me my aunt and uncle were coming and then my cousin and her boyfriend...how about the Indians? Are they coming too? Sorry, should I have said Native Americans?

My dad walks in and tells me there is enough pie so I walk out of the kitchen to go sit in the living room where my smart husband follows me. We know better than to have a battle of wits with my mom on a holiday. Big Red asks me if he should go to the store to buy a pie and my dad walks in and tells him absolutely not! So I whisper to my husband "If Jesus himself drops down and commands you to eat pie, don't you do it!" For that comment, WE WILL NOT EAT THE PIE SO THERE IS ENOUGH FOR EVERYONE! Geesh...I wanted to go home and get back in to bed after the verbal sparring my mothers handed down. She always has something to say and H knows because our mom's are twins when it comes to backhanded comments.

Despite the whole pie fiasco the food was great and the company was okay. My cousin showed up with her new boyfriend, some cop in uniform because he was on the job. I was hoping he was the same cop that pulled me over Tuesday morning for pigging backing to get through that red light but no luck. Get this. When I asked my aunt about her daughters new boyfriend she told me this would be the first time they were meeting him...yes, she chose Thanksgiving as the time to introduce him to the family. What a bonehead move. He seemed nice but I was not in the cop loving mood after Tuesday and of course Edgar's name comes up. WTF? Does Edgar know everyone in San Antonio? He tells me to say hi to Edgar, right. Say it yourself since you know him so well, he's not my work husband and get your ass back out there and get to work! Are there not criminals still at work, even on a holiday? Can you tell I was still bitter?

I did manage to walk in the kitchen where he was eating and say over the top of everyone "Make sure you have some pie, there's enough for everyone!". I did not get a ticket just a warning (not for the pie comment) but I am still not a fan of the men in blue even if I was in the wrong. Oh yeah, Big Red's mom is staying with us for a couple of nights. His sisters family dropped her off Thanksgiving eve and they proceeded to tell us all about the blast they had in Cancun so now we have to go to Cancun! All inclusive resort and they did all this fun stuff like hike the Mayan ruins and snorkel...I so want to go and all for the low low bargain basement price of $1,600 for both of them! H, the four of us are going to Mexico!

K

Tequila sunrise

I know the view isn't much to look at, what do you want? It's work! But the sky...the beautiful sky and all it's changing colors. It was pink, purple, orange, then blue...who wouldn't be thankful for a morning like this? I drove to work looking at this and smiling. It's not often I smile on my way to work. When I parked and got to the front door of the office I had to turn around and take a picture of this from my phone. I'm happy because it's a short day before a long weekend.

I plan to stuff myself with turkey, nap and make long, sweet love with my husband. Yes, I am aware I put eating before making love. A girl has her priorities. My mother in law is coming to stay with us for a couple of nights and I'm okay with that. At least we don't have to drive to Austin to see her.

Okay, I have to get some work done. I just wanted to stop and share for a moment before I dive head first in to work and forget everything else.

K

Have you ever had anyone named after you?

Did I ever tell you I have a namesake? Not a niece, or cousin, or even a family friend...but a dog. A dog named K, it's actually a Hawaiian name but I don't use it here in Texas 'cause no one can pronounce it. She was a cute little black puppy 12 years ago when I left home and my cousin B named her after me. B and I were close, like two peas in a pod close. We spent every weekend together, my life consisted of my family and that's about it.

When I lived in Hawaii it was all about the ohana. There were guys always in the background but my strongest bond was with my cousins (mostly male). We got together every weekend and supported Budweiser. We could easily finish off cases and cases of beer and we frequently did. If you're not from Hawaii it's difficult to understand the relationships formed. Hawaii is EXPENSIVE! Which is why so many families live at home for many, many years and I was no exception. I had a cottage behind my parents main house since we lived on a big acre of land. This cottage was never locked because so much family came and went. It was never empty, even when I was at work, one or more of my cousins was asleep on the couch. These were good days and I never worried about going out and getting drunk because I was with my ohana and we always took care of each other.

Anyhow, back to my namesake. The time came when I got serious about someone (Big Red) and I decided to leave Hawaii to be with him. Only when I went home again this past week did I learn what a big deal this was. Apparently one of my brothers had called my cousins to action to do a background check on my future husband because they needed to find out who this guy was taking me away from my home! It was most traumatic for B because we were so close. So before I left home he got a puppy to replace me. As if one could. I found out last week that this dog is still alive and living with my other cousin F and doing fabulous! We are a hearty stock. B left Hawaii as well to live in his wife's home state up east. Most of us drifted away...it has been 12 years.

Many good things came out of going home for my grandmother's funeral...we celebrated her life and for the first time since I moved away all of us grand kids got together again to reconnect. We came from Virginia, Maryland, Texas, Idaho, California, Kauai, and the Big Island and this is exactly what she would have wanted. The night of the funeral we toasted to her and got old time drunk and spent the evening saying "remember when...". Man, I'm exhausted and need to get used to the time difference. Beer and I will be taking a brief vacation from one another for a while but I have no doubt we will see each other again in the very near future.

K

It's 12:20 a.m. Thursday morning and I can't sleep because I have so much shit in my head. I feel like I have been on fast forward for the second week in a row and I can't seem to stop and be still for a moment. I just returned from Hawaii on Sunday and I am leaving again for Hawaii on Friday...tomorrow. Damn, my brain is fried. I have so much to get done at work before I go and I feel guilty when my husband calls me at night to ask me when I am coming home. I go to work and it's dark and I come home and it's dark and I can't even remember if I'm coming or going. I had 5 cups of coffee this morning and I'm operating on 4 hours of sleep a night. I know I am going to come crashing down but I'm hoping it won't be until the plane ride.

I dread this trip more than anything because I hate funerals, who doesn't? I just got done writing out the eulogy and now feel drained. I just want my life back to normal, is that selfish? I feel like it is. I spent all of last week sad and watched people around me suffer so this week I have not wanted to pause and think about all that. But tonight I got in to bed and pulled up the blanket that she made me and burst in to tears. So I come here to e-mail myself a to do list for work tomorrow so I won't think about it. So far, distraction not working.

K

Remember when young love was stupid?

Tonight while I was going through an old journal , a note fell out of it. It was written on hotel stationary and was not in my handwriting. It was a love note from an ex that said “K has found a spacious room in T’s heart”. This took me way back to the 80’s when I was a student at BYU Hawaii – not every student is Mormon! T was my first real love or so I thought. We both worked at the student activities desk and our job was to answer student’s social questions, basically socialize. He was from Kiribati and therefore, different and exciting to me.

He was attracted to me because I wasn’t Mormon, I was fun and dangerous ‘cause I was one of the girls who drank and wasn’t a virgin. Our relationship started out purely sexual and developed in to something more serious. We had 9 months of making love every night at the beach under the stars, and attending school functions where we got off on trying not to get caught making out in the bathroom.

Things got serious fast when he asked me to marry him and me being foolish and young, said yes. I remember my father saying “What does this boy have to offer you?! He’s not even from this country and has nothing!”. He was right but wasn't that really part of my attraction to him? Did I really think he could marry me since I wasn’t Mormon? The demise of our relationship came as a complete surprise to me when I found a receipt for wedding bands in his wallet and it wasn’t my name being engraved on one of them.

There was so much drama and emotion involved in that breakup and it was not a simple cut and dry. I can now admit it took me a full two years to get over that love. I could no longer listen to Gloria Estefan because we always listened to her when we had sex. I finally took him off my speed dial at work, stopped checking his horoscope in the paper, and stopped wondering how and if the marriage even worked out. She was Mormon.

That relationship really set the tone for all future relationships and for the longest time the biggest lesson I took from T was “screw them before you get screwed”. I’m not proud of that lesson and it eventually ruined most of my future relationships. What a shocker. But the end of that relationship was also the beginning of my second one, with one of his best friends. If it sounds like it was developed out of pure spite, you’d be right about that. But the story of Rebound guy is for another post at a later date when the meaning of “Revenge is a dish best served cold” never rang truer.

K

Is it just me?

Today while using the ladies room at work, someone came out of the stall next to me and gave herself a perfunctory hand wash sans soap, after changing out a tampon. WTF? Is it just me or is this unsanitary? Maybe it's just the way my mind works but soap is there for a reason, no?

This is why I touch everything with paper towels, I'm on the verge of becoming OCD about germs again and seeing things like this doesn't help. I tell ya sometimes it's hard to be me just 'cause I'm a tad neurotic.

K

Best response in most situations

K

Have you seen my maples anywhere?

Why do they call it Lost Maples if you can find it? We drove to Lost Maples today to go hiking and it was absolutely beautiful. Not all the leaves have changed but enough to make for a beautiful picture. The weather was awesome if not a little cold for me but it was perfect weather for hiking with an overwhelming abundance of sunshine.

Here I am at the trail head of our 5 mile hike obviously feeling a little camera shy and timid.

Someone got over herself real quick and really loved this trail, it was like something out of a movie. I was so happy at the beginning of the trail, look how I'm smiling and full of energy until...

See this picture I like to call it foreshadowing, because while I was totally kidding when we came upon the sign, it all came full circle once we started the stairway to Satan's penthouse. This sign states 1.5 miles of steep trail ahead and what you don't know about me is I have instant karma. Today was no exception and karma almost killed me on the 1.5 miles of UPHILL trail. This pose was one I had to repeat many times on the way up - I believe we had to stop and rest at least 4 times, along with many other hikers we encountered in the "resting" position as well, because it was a 5 mile hike.

My husband was showing me what a stud he was by sprinting up Satan's stairs but at a couple of points he had to actually pull me up over rocks. Every time we thought we had reached the top there were more steep hills and bigger rocks ahead but we forged on.

The view was breathtaking until we realized that trail we saw was the one we needed to get down to in order to get out of here. Holy Hell we're only half way?! It's 5 miles! By now I'm thinking they should have donkey rentals up here to carry me down.

This was a long and rocky path downhill and by the time we got to the bottom I had passed out on a sunning rock. 5 miles can do that to a person. I kept thinking I was going to slip down this hell, oops I meant hill, and pick up so much speed that by the time I got to the bottom my clothes would have just been shredded all to pieces and I'd be a naked quivering mass of blood and bone.

Apparently, only the top of my head made it down to the water. Big Red and the rest of me caught up in time to snap this picture of us smiling because we were almost at the end of our 5 mile hike.

This hike was so beautiful and we need to take more drives to the Hill Country. All I kept thinking on the drive out there was why would anyone want to live in such a remote area? I get that it is gorgeous but damn! I complain all the time on how crowded S.A. is. How much traffic and new homes there are here, but give me an H.E.B. , Chinese food and Starbucks right down the street and all is forgiven.

We ended up stopping in Medina at the apple store to snack on apple turnovers, apple ice cream, apple butter...you get the picture. They're famous for apples! By the time we got to Bandera we were starving and stopped at the OST for some real food. The thing I love about Bandera is the old fashioned western ambiance of it. All these people just riding horses down main street.

While neither my husband and I are native Texans and have been here for almost 9 years, we just love going out and discovering parts of Texas that we really do love.

Did I mention it was a 5 mile hike?

K

What the?

I was partaking in one of my favorite pastimes while I was on the internet - no, not porn - this isn't H, shopping for shoes. Oh my, the cutest red Mary Jane's that I ever laid eyes on. When all of a sudden I clicked on the next page and these hideous things assaulted my eyes!!

My first thought was what the fuck? I had to click on them and they are called muk luk's, oh the name is just as bad as the picture. I think the name may even be fuglier than the actual shoe/slipper/sock. My second thought was who would wear this monstrosity? I bet you Sarah Palin wears them. She's a moose hunter from Alaska, it's a given. Where on the frozen tundra would you be caught dead in these?

I had to avert my eyes and then close the website because I started feeling queasy. Who knew shoe shopping could lead to such tragedy? I feel dirty.

K

Yes, this is now a dog blog, get over it!

Okay, so how fucking cute is this picture of Max holding on to his stuffed squirrel?! Notice how he slept with one eye open, always on guard over Pooter (the squirrel).He used to carry this thing around with him constantly until we finally had to throw it away because Nani ripped the shit out of it in a jealous rage. Left the cotton guts spread all over the living room one day and we had to console Max with a new toy.

Max with the latest love of his life, Hildy the Hedgehog. May they live a long and happy life together, at least until Nani gets a hold of it.

K

Having a good day?

Good, good, so glad your day is going well. My day? Please refer to the following e-mail I sent H today.

From: K
Sent: Monday, October 20, 2008 11:13 AM
To: H
Subject:*&%$#

I am so frustrated today and back to hating all mankind! I wish I knew Spanish just so I could rattle off a string of obscenities at anyone who crosses my path. Beware the accountant today!

K

It's a dog's life

Look how adorable my babies are!

Nani, we refer to her as our new area rug, is showing off her shaved belly and not very happy that I am disturbing her nap. Max sunning himself in the front windows with a look that begs to go out for a walk.

They are so precious!

K

6 months sober and down the drain for 99 cent beer

Fast Eddie looking down my shirt, it cracks me up!




Never mind the drunk couple with lampshades, look at my awesome cunt kicking boots!



Gay love...'aint it grand!

Aaron, our wonderful waiter, who regretted the moment he told us his name because we kept yelling it all night.

Why is Fast Eddie pointing at my boobs...again! H looks drunk, no?

Yes, 6 months without going out and getting drunk...and it all went down the drain in one hazy evening. I meant to blog about this earlier but it has taken me this long just to get over Friday night.

After 6 months of sobriety it's amazing how drunk you can get on only three 99 cent Bud Lite's. I can't lie, I laughed, I had fun and it had been too long. I even took some people down with me, namely H. It was worth it just to see these crazy faces and hear everyone laugh.

Too bad Mother Teresa had to leave early and then we lost the lovely gay couple of Roman and Stephan because they had to go eat "Pecking Duck" at some birthday party at one of R's old lovers. Now I am not stupid like Roman but he insisted this is how you pronounce Peking duck! So we were left with the four of us and Fast Eddie insisted on going dancing at the Heat. It was only 9 p.m. and gay clubs don't really get going until midnight but there was Fast Eddie and Myshell out there on the dance floors doing moves I haven't seen since the 80's. H and I believe they were trying to work out all the sexual tension they have for each other.

Anyway, I had a blast and realize I am so old that it takes me a whole weekend to recoup from this kind of shit. Big Red and I drove out to Canyon Lake and it was gorgeous out, not a cloud in the sky and a chill was in the air. Then we came home and napped because that is what old people do.

K

Mexican Church Lady

This made me laugh out loud! This is H at lunch today with his styling cat eye glasses that T found. This made me laugh so hard and that is why lunch with H is my favorite part of the day!

K

You can't figure this out? Really?

Okay so I get this e-mail yesterday and how stupid do you have to be to NOT be able to figure this out? It's not bad enough that she can't figure it out but she has asked me this question every year since she has left her employment with us...8 years! She is in her 50's by now and this isn't calculus people! How does she function in a new job if she can't figure out this simple equation? Just another example of stupidity running rampant. This takes a special kind of stupid to not understand basic math, no? Again, this is what comes from hating all mankind today.

Importance: High

Hi K,

I need your help again……………..(if you don’t mind)………..My current pay is $16.50/hr. I recently received a 3.2% raise, what would my current hourly pay be ???? J

Thanks!!!

Basic Math Idiot
Stupid Dept.
123 Main St. SAT 78249
Work: (800) 867-5309
Dummy.Idiot@yahoo.com

Grouchy and mean,

K

You change your mind like a girl changes clothes

Good Morning! No, no that wasn't right, it's more like "hey..'morning" followed by a heavy sigh. It's 7 a.m. Monday morning and it's raining. What a great start to a work week. I am just doing more random blogging to put off the inevitable...work.

When I stopped to fill my gas tank this morning (2.89!) I also filled my other tank with coffee. Who would have thought we would be excited about 2.89 gas, remember when it was .99?! I'm old.

So while I have had my morning coffee I'm still a little blue about this rainy day. I don't know why because I like the rain but that song by The Carpenters keeps playing in my head..rainy days and Monday's always get me down. The Carpenters? Really? Again...I'm old.

This weekend while we were taking a Sunday drive (old like Miss Daisy) and hating all mankind, my husband turned to me and said "Do you realize we have been together 12 years and that is the longest relationship I have ever had?". I of course had to be a smart ass and say that I had longer relationships with other men...my dad, my brothers, Jesus...

Do you ever notice how putting on lipstick makes you feel better? It makes me feel better anyway. I downloaded some ITunes last night - Katy Perry, Jessica Simpson and Darius Rucker - talk about random. Now I'm just rambling like a rose so I gotta get to work. I know, I know..rambling rose, I'm old.

K

Huh?

I'm exhausted! I have been tired all weekend, I'm not even kidding. I slept for 9 hours yesterday, got up, ate breakfast and napped another two hours, got up, ate lunch and napped again! Yet still slept like a baby last night. WTF? I am old.

Today I've been so tired and been trying to keep busy so I don't nap but so hard...my eyes just wanted to rest so I tried to find stuff to do. We had sex. Went for a drive. Cleaned house. Made dinner. Read a book. Washed our sheets. Tried not to nap. So ready to go to bed and it's only 7:20. It's official, I am not my mom but my grandmother. Oh help me someone. If I get sick I will be so mad! Discovered today that I dislike all mankind. I know, I know but it's true. I am my grandmother/Ebenezer Scrooge all in one. What happened to the days when one could go for a nice Sunday drive without all these people around?! Clearly not napping has turned me in to a grouch.

K

Fat Dog

funny...

You have to love the Cho.