Friday, June 27, 2008

Fat - Yay or nay?

Am I less tolerant of fat people now because I no longer want to be one?'s an interesting thought. I feel like I am getting healthier and changing and I guess I am in a different place than I used to be. But I am still fat so I don't know why I am feeling this way. It both bothers me and intrigues me.

Just because you change your mind do you feel others should change as well? If I were to stop believing in God would I expect others to stop believing as well? If I could no longer see would I not want to be around people who could? I need to go ponder on why I am feeling this way.

Is it because it reminds me of how I used to be or how I am afraid of being anymore/again (not sure, maybe both)? Do I now believe that people are this way just because they are lazy (my reason)? Am I afraid of failure in this area (yes)? Do I avoid people or situations that got me here in the first place now (yes)? Since I am fat shouldn't I be more understanding therefore tolerant? There is some deep rooted psychological reason I feel this way, I'm just not sure I want to know what it is. What if I don't like what I find when I get there?


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